Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Naked in the boardroom

There is a certain vulnerability about standing naked in front of stranger, in an environment that is not quite the norm for such activities.

I wondered how many others have been in a similar situation, standing completely as nature intended in the Boardroom... two that I am aware of and one to follow.

Arms raised in a Barbie doll pose as the cold sensation hits my body. I shudder and my body involuntarily flinches each time the overpowering cocoa scented, mud coloured, cold spray is applied to each section of my warm body.

Long, continuous strokes as instructions are provided... turn slightly, move your legs slightly apart, one in front of the other now, raise arms, close your eyes and hold your breathe, don't squint.

The whole process takes less than 10 minutes, however it is all part of the female ritual of getting tizzed and glammed up for the Company's Anniversary Ball and Award evening. The ritual commencing approximately 6 weeks prior.

A ritual with a strict time frame.

The ritual commencing with an organised girl's day out searching for the dress and matching accessories. What girl does not like such a day out shared with a friend? Especially when discovering an outlet that still provides excellent customer service. Cups of tea, served in fine white china, and biscuits offered and accepted. A section dedicated to dresses and gowns reduced at amazing prices. Girlie heaven.

Discovering racks of treasures of glamorous colour, textures and lengths. Arms ladened with a myriad of choices to be tried on, giggled over, assistance provided with zips and hooks, deep breaths in as the zip will zip up, oohs over each dress as it is modelled. An hour (or so) later, success, gowns secured.

A much needed lunch break, to recover from such exhausting activity, and time to discuss fervently what matching jewellery and shoes are required. Replenished with refreshments, next stop the nearby shopping centre. Three shoe shops and five fashion shops later, matching shoes and sparkling bling acquired. Time for cappuccino and skinny late before heading home to try on and prance and preen in front of home mirror with recent purchases.

The next ritual in this precision time frame, hair appointment a week prior to the event. Hair trimmed, colour applied and discussion with the hairdresser over the different options hair could be styled for the evening, appointment made for the afternoon prior to the event.

A week of daily exfoliating leading up to the present ritual of standing naked in front of a stranger, in a mobile, three sided tent having a spray tan applied, the evening before the Ball. Organised by a work colleague. The only appropriate area for the mobile set-up, the Boardroom.

The spraying over, the tan's wetness is dried off with a dryer. As I put on my loose fitting clothes I cheekily wonder what Board members would think at such activity occurring in their room, if only they knew!

Friday, September 24, 2010

By special request

For two special people ... Your request!
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